One Week

A week ago I felt my world was falling apart. My son was sent to jail, the girls were fighting and mad at me, my marriage is over and the residual effects of that are draining me emotionally, I’m going through perimenopause so my emotions are all over the place and I felt alone. To top it off I had hopes of having lunch with a friend who had to cancel and as understandable as it was it took me spiraling down into the depths of hell. I cried most of the weekend and felt like I wanted to be anywhere but here.

It was the perfect opportunity for me to reach out and say I need to talk but instead I withdrew into my shell and went it alone. I made it through the weekend but it was time wasted instead of shared. It was miserable instead of comforting and therapeutic. I did have a few people who reached out to me and gave me words of advice and tried to steer me back on the right path and that did help but I was my own worst enemy at that point. I was determined to take the blame and heap it on my shoulders. I wanted to wallow in my misery and pain because it’s all I know. It’s like Linus’ blanket. My miseries, my hell, and my life’s failures all bring me comfort.

The idea of happiness, peace and joy are unfamiliar to me but something I advocate strongly for in the lives of others.

Today I am better. Things haven’t changed but my mindset has. Instead of wanting to wallow I am pulling myself out of the pit and advocating for myself. I want to be able to find something meaningful out of all of this and to reflect back on this time and be able to see where God has brought me from and feel blessed and loved like I know that I am. I want to stop going it alone.

So it is 6:00 on Saturday morning and I am embracing the fact that I am wide awake due to night sweats and in the midst of writing this have been having hot flashes because it’s all a part of my life and I am loving it good, bad and indifferent!

For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning. (Psalm 30:5)

Heartaches Take Time

I have listened to this CD every night for the past two months as I fall asleep. I am trying to find my way back to Him. I am trying to make sense of it all. The songs and the spoken words on this CD are so awesome and inspiring that it is hard to remain stone cold as you listen to it over and over and over.

Here’s the description used on Amazon to describe the CD.

HEARTACHES TAKE TIME – Featuring Mike Shiflett & Terry Sharpe Life can change in the blink of an eye. It is during these time of heartache and crisis, when our world falls apart, and when the nights are darker than they have ever been, that we can experience God’s love in a deeper, more intimate way. Sometimes when our hearts are hurting, God speaks to us when we cannot utter a word or prayer. It is during this time that He comes to us through friends, family and strangers who care. But what happens when these caring people go home, as they should, and we are once again alone? This CD was created to be placed in the hands of someone going through heartache or needing a special time of reassurance. It acts as a reminder that we are never alone. God walks right beside us through the darkest valleys until we can reach higher ground. Whether you are experiencing the loss of someone you love, a separation or divorce, an injury, illness or addition, loss of a job or home, or receive some shocking news, these events may leave you devastated. Mike Shiflett’s strong tenor voice, accompanied by Terry Sharpe’s soothing words of comfort and hope, assures the listener that someone is praying for them as they begin a new chapter of life, traveling down a different road…a road of faith, hope and joy!

My favorite spoken word on there is the title piece “Heartaches Take Time”. I took the time to write out the words.

HEARTACHES TAKE TIME

By Mike Shiflett & Terry Sharpe

Heartaches do take time and it’s in these moments of brokenness we find ourselves hungering for healing. We’re desperately seeking meaning and direction from this pain which often leaves us feeling crushed and isolated.

I pray Gods mighty hand will offer you protection and the very angels of God will watch over you. He alone is the only one who fully understands where you are hurting; where you need healing and how to bring you hope. No one can fully recognize what you are feeling and what you are experiencing. Only you know the depth of your emotion. You own it. Your struggle right now is not to allow your heartache to own you. You have to walk into the valley, you’ve got to walk through it which means that you’re going to come out on the other side and God will be with you.

It takes healing, it takes hope and it takes time to know that you will be able to walk through it. And on days when you may feel that you can’t walk, know that it is then that God carries you. He will carry you until you have the wings to fly. When you see the dawning of a new day it is then His grace will surround you and you will know beyond a shadow of a doubt that His wings of strength will protect you and his presence will be so close to you. It is then that you will be able to hear his whisper of assurance in your ear.

Often God sends godly people into our lives to give us direction and yes to walk down a different road. A road of strength, a road of hope, of new direction and a road of renewing who you are because God has created you to be uniquely you. He knows your name. He cares for you and He loves you.

I am trying to embrace those words. They are like salve on a wound but my heart and mind remain stubborn and try to blot out the feelings these words invoke. But I won’t be thwarted. I will continue to listen to this CD every night as I go to sleep and over time I know they will penetrate the dark recesses of my mind and I will know the truthfulness of it all and start the true healing and recovery process that only God can do in me.

If you know someone who is broken, hurting, lost or suffered from multiple losses this CD can soothe them and give them comfort while allowing His presence to do a mighty work on the inside of them. It’s work the cost to see the joy and peace come back into their lives.

Under Attack

In four days I will be in Concord, NC attending the She Speaks! Conference presented by Proverbs 31 Ministries. I have been prompted to attend this conference for the past three years and have never been able to pull it off due to scheduling, finances, childcare, etc. And finally this year it has all come together... almost. Can I tell you how busy the enemy is in my life right now. Do I even have to energy to list out the ways that he is attacking me? As you can imagine, some of the most off the wall things have taken place; are trying to trip me up and just flat out make me throw in the towel. The drama at my house has been incredible this past weekend and today is off to another great start but I will not be moved. I am going even if I have to put my thumb out there and hitch a ride!

I trust that God has this all worked out and that if I do my part then He has to do his. We have walked this path together to get to this point and I don't think for a second that he would bring me this far to leave me but the enemy is a formidable opponent and I can't let down my guard because if I do the results could be devastating.

With that said, please pray for me this week. Pray for my household, my children, my husband. Pray for peace in the midst of the chaos. Pray for wisdom and knowledge to discern what is the will of God and what is the trickery of the enemy. Pray for traveling safety. And last, but not least, pray for me.

Pray that as I put my speeches to bed that the words that I have come up with are the words that God has for me to share. That I will not be nervous and that the spirit will lead and guide me so that when I am presenting they will see God and not me. Pray that His light will shine through me and he will get the glory out of what I say. Pray that my ears, eyes and heart will be open and receptive to the teachings from the speakers, the judges and the 600 sisters in Christ who will be attending the conference with me this weekend.

Pray that I will be strengthened in my mind to let go and let God. That I will remain focused on Him during this week and not get caught up in everything that is happening all around me. Pray that I have the wherewithal to understand that I cannot change what is happening but I don't have to allow it to affect me, my focus and get me off track from where my mind should be. Pray that I won't let my emotions get the best of me and that as the week progresses that I will begin to have anticipation and joy about the good things that are awaiting me at the conference.

And while you are praying for me, know that I will be praying for you to help take the focus off of my situation and find peace in being of service to others.

Every day is...

In less than 48 hours millions of women all over the world will be receiving breakfast in bed, flowers, home-made cards, bathrobes, body wash, jewelry and an assortment of brunches, dinners, desserts, etc. in celebration of Mother’s Day.

I appreciate the fact that we take time out each year to celebrate mom’s, dad’s and now even grandparents but feel conflicting emotions about why we do it.

In my book it ranks up there with Valentine’s Day. A day I don’t see any real value to. I don’t really get into it because I don’t feel that we should be told to show our love on any given day, in any particular way. Love is not something that can be brought by giving someone a box of chocolates or a dozen roses no more than you can say thanks to your mom, dad or grandparents with a card, a bouquet of flowers or a nice dinner somewhere.

If you have children then you know that every day is Mother’s, Father’s or Grandparent’s day. Parenthood is one of the greatest gifts God could bestow upon us, after the gift of mercy and grace brought to us through his son, Jesus Christ, who died for our sins.

Not everyone will have the opportunity to be a parent and nor does everyone desire that blessing. But when it happens to you and you embrace it for what it is, the blessings you receive from it outweigh any gift anyone could possibly give you as way of thanks.

I have never felt that a thank you was ever needed for the gift of my children. In fact, I feel that I am the one who should be thanking God for these blessings that He has allowed me to have in my life for however long He chooses to share them with me. They are not mine forever but merely on loan. It is an awesome responsibility; one that I take very seriously. It is my job to instill in them a solid foundation of God and his truth so that they can carry out the plan He has designed for each of their lives.

We were taught in the Bible to “honor our parents” as one of the original Ten Commandments. This is not a one time thing but a continuous act throughout our lives. It is what we do when we take what they have instilled in us and use it for the greater good. It is what we do when we sift the good from the bad and focus on the good. It is the inheritance we leave to our children. They will mirror our patterns. How we treat our parents will show them how to treat us when we get older. The love, respect and reverence we place upon our parents will flow down to our children and when we are gone they will know what to do not just from our words but most especially from our actions.


Exodus 20:12 “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”

Deuteronomy 4:9-10 Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Remember the day you stood before the Lord your God at Horeb, when he said to me, “Assemble the people before me to hear my words so that they may learn to revere me as long as they live in the land and may teach them to their children.”

Deuteronomy 6:6-9 These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Deuteronomy 11:18-19 Fix these words of mine in your hearts and minds; tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Teach them to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

We are also taught in the Word how to raise our children. Parenting is not an easy job.

2 Timothy 3:16-17 All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.

You will make mistakes; you will have trials and tribulation. Some will bring deep, gut wrenching heartbreak and others joy so overwhelming you won’t know how to contain it. There are no manuals, road maps or detailed instructions that will make your job any easier than what you will find in the Bible. The principles laid out in there will get you through the toughest of times and help you enjoy the good times even more.

Proverbs 13:24 He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

Proverbs 19:18 Discipline your son, for in that there is hope; do not be a willing party to his death.

Proverbs 22:6 Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

God holds children in the highest esteem and so should we. Yes, there are times when you would rather deny the existence of your children, long for your single days or declare war on the world should someone call you “mommy” for the gazillionth time but those moments are fleeting as is the time that we have with our children. I have learned much from them. They keep me humble. I have learned how to love unconditionally, to put off the selfish part of me in sacrifice for their needs, wants and desires. I have become stronger yet weaker and evolved into a totally different person as a result of having these children in my life. They are not burdens; they are not the reason for our failures. They should not carry our shame, bear the brunt of our anger or frustration. They are innocent in His eyes. They did not ask to be here and surely if they bring such joy to God they can bring some joy to you.

I understand that not all children are alike. Some have issues physically, mentally and psychologically that require a great deal of patience and restraint but with God, friends and family we can still have times of great delight with these children. They are blessings from God. Wonderful, marvelous blessings that can carry on our legacy for generations to come when we do what is required of us. Love them unconditionally, without malice, without prejudice, without restraint. Treating each one as the individual that he/she is. No preconceived notions just accepting them for who they are. Take time to listen to them, to "hear" them, to understand their needs. Each one is different but each one is special.

Psalms 144:12 Then our sons in their youth will be like well-nurtured plants, and our daughters will be like pillars carved to adorn a palace.

Proverbs 14:26 He who fears the Lord has a secure fortress, and for his children it will be a refuge.

3 John 4 I have no greater joy than to hear that my children are walking in the truth.

Luke 18:15-17 People were bringing even infants to him that he might touch them; and when the disciples saw it, they sternly ordered them not to do it. But Jesus called for them and said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not stop them; for it is to such as these that the kingdom of God belongs. Truly I tell you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God as a little child will never enter it."

Matthew 18:1-5 At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, " Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" He called a child, whom he put among the, and said, "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever becomes humble like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven. Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me."

So while my kids, my gifts from God, spend the next 48 hours attempting to shower me with love, gifts and platitudes of thanks I will be giving God thanks, praise and honor for allowing me to enjoy them for such a time as this. Knowing that thanks from them is not necessary but hearing the words from His mouth on my day of judgement, "well done, thy good and faithful servant" will be all the thanks I could ever hope for.

FREE

I have had one of the best weeks of my life this week. The only way to describe it is FREE. The millstone that has weighed me down for my entire life has been cut from my neck. This whole week has been one filled with confirmation after confirmation from scriptures, music, devotionals and notes from friends and family. I am truly blessed to have such wonderful people in my life that care about me and support me, but my greatest blessings come from God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. They have ministered to me this week through the Word in ways I never thought possible. It’s like the blinders were lifted and verses I’ve read time and time again now have new meaning. All those scriptures I have hidden up in my heart are being released unto me and giving me great hope, joy and understanding of everything that has transpired in my life.

I found this week, through my prayer and study time, that I have a great love for my mother; much deeper than I would have imagined. The love I have for her is the love of Christ, which is a love that releases her from the burden of fulfilling me in ways that she cannot. This is a love that transcends our fleshy selves but focuses on the spiritual being in each of us. It’s not about her approval, her love or her acceptance. It is a love for the woman that gave birth to me. Although there were times when I was ok with the thought of not being here, I am grateful for the life she gave me. It is the love that allows forgiveness for hurts real and imagined; for shortcomings and ignorance. It is a love that we should have for each other when we accept Christ into our lives and proclaim Him to be our Lord and Savior. The second greatest command that He gave us “…You shall love your neighbor as yourself…” Mark 12:31 (KJV)

This week I discovered that I am free to live my life and walk out the destiny God has for me instead of seeking for something I was never destined to find or have from the world. I now understand the scripture “But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.” in Matthew 6:33 (KJV) in a way I couldn’t have before. I have been looking to my mother for her approval, her love and her acceptance when all along I should have been looking to God first. He will provide all those things to me: love, approval, acceptance and peace indescribable peace when I follow His Word. I have walked in this blessing all week.

One of my devotionals this week also reaffirmed to me that I have been putting too much emphasis on the relationship with my mother and helped me keep the focus on where my priorities should be. Mary Welchel of the Christian Working Woman had this life lesson in her transcripts for Wednesday at www.thechristianworkingwoman.org. I have highlighted the words that resounded in my ears as I heard it on the radio and leapt off the page as I read them.

Life Lesson #5: Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
You know, I often remind myself that people aren't thinking about me nearly as much as I think they're thinking about me! Isn't it true that we often put ourselves under unnecessary stress by just taking ourselves too seriously! We worry about what others will think of us and that can become an obsession. What others think about you is not your business, so let it go!

Here's the secret: Make it your passion to care very much about what God thinks about you. Pray daily that God will grow you into the mature Christian he wants you to be. Let God's Word reveal areas in your life that need changing, and then by God's grace, work on them. Care very much about what God thinks about you.

But stop worrying about what others think about you. Stop imagining what they're thinking or saying. First of all, you'll never please everyone, no matter how hard you try. And secondly, have you ever thought about how wrong it is to care more about what other people think of you than you do about what God thinks about you? Remember, it's not all about you; it's all about God and what he wants to do with your life. So, don't take yourself so seriously.

Also this week I listened to my worship music and found great peace and solace at the words I heard from Kirk Franklin, CeCe Winans, Toby Mac, Mandisa, Marvin Sapp, Youth for Christ, J Moss, James Fortune & Fyre and many more.

The greatest joy came when I shouted the words to “Imagine Me” with Kirk Franklin, especially the chorus “Gone, gone, all gone, all my scars, pain; in the past. What your mother did, what your father did, gone, gone, all gone.” And it is… All gone. Everything that I held against her, all the hurt, all the pain, all the scars, gone. I am FREE.

Thank you Lord for I am free.

Free at last, free at last, Lord God Almighty, I am free at last!

Comparison is the thief of joy

Comparison is the thief of joy, comparison is the thief of joy, comparison is the thief of joy. Come on, say it with me. Comparison is the thief of joy. Now ponder those six words. Let them resonate in your soul. What an epiphany. Really, it is. We don’t stop and wonder why we feel bad about our life and what is going on, only that we feel that way and wish that we didn’t. But what triggered the thought? What brought you to the place that made you feel like you were missing something?

When I read Tracey’s post it clicked, almost audibly, that I was a victim of comparison. As long as I went about my life living it to its fullest, I was fine but when I started comparing my circumstances to the people around me I noticed a change. I was unhappy, bitter, angry and even resentful sometime of what others had that I didn’t. It didn’t matter that I didn’t need it or even want it. The issue was that they had and I did not. It made me feel inferior and out of my league when in reality I’m right where I need to be. I mean seriously, how could I not be? How many people can say that they are doing what they enjoy doing and get paid a pretty decent salary to boot. I’m living my dream and although it isn’t what other people had for me it’s what I wanted. Maybe not 100% how I imagined it would be, but pretty dead on. Are there things I would change? Absolutely but not at the expense of losing what I have, who I am or walking outside of what God has for me vs. what I “think” I should have because someone else has it.

I’d love a bigger house with a bigger bedroom and a bathtub/shower combo in my bathroom, a mini cooper, new furniture, a tank full of heating oil, a pantry overflowing and money to spare but what would I have to sacrifice in order to have it? Working two jobs, 60+ hours a week, less time with my husband and kids, less time to volunteer at church or at the Y? No thanks. I’ll survive. We always have and in the end that’s what matters. I imagine that one day there will be a time when some of those things will come about a lot easier than they do now and I will cherish that time but in the meantime I won’t keep wishing for, snipping about and salivating over the new stuff that Mr. & Mrs. Jones got because I’m not sure I want to have to go through what they went through to get what they have. Besides, who’s to say that they are any happier than I am because they have all of that stuff?

In the long run, if I lost everything that I have but still had my husband and kids to love that’s all I’d need. We’d pick up the pieces and start all over again.

So I’m going to make a concerted effort to not let myself get caught up in the comparison game. I don’t want to lose the joy I do have about my life for the stuff that I don’t have.

How about you? Is your joy being stolen like a thief?

Comfort & Joy

Two words that often go hand in hand but I’ve never really given them much thought other than singing it in a Christmas carol until last week.

I was in Bay Shore, NY with my mom, dad and two sisters attending the funeral of my mother’s youngest brother when the thought struck me and I was able to see the two words mesh together for what I believe was their intended purpose.

We drove up from Richmond to connect with my parents and sister in Maryland before heading to New York. I left work, kids, and holiday parties unattended, packed a bag and got on the road. After all, family is first in my book. My mother was taking this pretty hard. It was her baby brother. He was the youngest of 10 children and she was number 9. They had grown up together and were very close. We have all been anticipating the death of another brother who is suffering from cancer and so this was a surprise. She was emotionally drained from another death the preceding week so we were all very much aware of her fragility and it was our desire to be there with her and for her. We wanted to comfort her, support her and provide whatever we could by way of our physical presence.

It was during this time of closeness (10 hours in a car with 5 people) that the meaning of the words came together. She took great comfort in our being there and joy in our presence as we caught up on each other's lives, reminisced about the past, both the good and the bad, and during the silence - each deep in our own thoughts, allowed the Holy Spirit to have his way with us.

We attended the wake and to my great surprise when they opened the floor for comments my mother was the first to get up there and say something. She said we drew strength from the family and those in attendance. No one would have known earlier her brokenness, her heartache and her desire to just curl up in a ball and wish it all away or better yet to be with her brother.

I was blessed by the words from the crowd as they got up and recalled what my uncle meant in their lives. I saw tears stop flowing and smiles spreading, we had a few moments of deep laughter and there was much joy in the room from the memories that will last us the remainder of our lives.

One of the final speakers was a 10 year old boy who summed up the events of the evening like no other. He realized from all that was said that he was missing out on something great in his life and he was sad. He told us to stop taking people for granted. To embrace them while they are here and to find the time to be around them and learn all that we could from them because when they are gone, they are gone and something great is missed.

Wow, from the mouth of babes. Those words resonated around that room and soaked into our hearts. We applauded this young man for his words and the spirit in which they were delivered.

That young man did not realize that he had not missed out in what my uncle taught us during our lives but that during that moment he just displayed for us something that my uncle will always be remembered for - CHARACTER.

And from that we all felt comfort and joy.

MIA no more

I have been so busy with life (school, the flu has been through the house 2 times, viruses, sinus infections, back issues, birthdays, visitation, weddings, work, church, class, etc.) but at the same time struggling with what to put out here.

In the past my blogs have been about me, my journey with my kids through domestic violence and pretty much everything in between. Now I'm in a new place and things are different. What used to be important to me then isn't now.

God is doing a marvelous work in me and it is causing me to see things clearer than ever before. He has become the focal point of my life. My days start with Him and I try throughout the day to carry Him with me in everything that I do, say or think. Granted I don't always win that battle but to me the important part is that I try. Nothing beats a failure but a try. So if I fail today I start again tomorrow that same way - praise & worship, scripture reading and prayers.

I get great joy out of reading His Word. The verses leap off the page at me and I have a deeper understanding of scriptures I have read over and over during my life. I thirst for His presence and feel lost and out of sorts if I miss my quiet time, church on Wednesday or Sunday. I don't read the same books, watch the same TV shows or even think the same thoughts. My life isn't all about me anymore, it's more about what I can do with it so that He can get the glory.

This isn't some big "transition" in my life. My entire life has been based on a foundation of God, faith in Him, his Word and Jesus Christ. The difference is in me and how I am now using what has been established/inbred in me. I've clung to Him in my darkest moments and can honestly say that I am alive today because of my faith and obedience to Him and his Word. But my day to day living has been about me, my kids, surviving the chaos of my life and enduring to the end. Somewhere in this journey I forgot about joy, hope, dreams and desires that make life worth living. I forgot about the promises for abundance, prosperity and cups overflowing - not with monetary things but with the fruits of the spirit, with peace that surpasses all understanding, with love unconditional. Things that can only come from a deep and intimate relationship with Him.

I spent a lot of time in my early years "looking for love in all the wrong places" and never finding it. I substituted stuff for love - a trip to the mall filled the void left from never feeling "loved", "good enough" or "pretty enough" but once I got back home and put it all away, the void was still there. When I did get into a relationship I thought the person in the relationship was supposed to fill those gaps but it never happened. Time and time again I got hurt, used, abused and left with voids wider and deeper than before. What I wasn't understanding was that no one could fill those voids - no earthly person that is. But God can and has.

I don't long for my husband to make everything better now, my kids won't always be there to keep the loneliness at bay, and friends, family and jobs come and go. There is only one true constant in our lives and that is the love of God, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. No matter where I am, what is going on, what I need, want and desire, how bad I act or how down in the pits of hell I have allowed myself to descend I am NOT alone! He is with me never leaving nor forsaking me and if I but just reach out, call out or whisper His name He is there.

Earlier this year when I began posting again I was sharing some devotionals and the feelings they stirred in me but then I shied away from that. I started thinking that no one would read it if it was too religious. I didn't want to be preachy or perceived as being greater or having more knowledge than anyone else so I stopped. But the desire to still comment and reflect on what I feel when I read His Words posted by others, read in my daily emails from great resources out in the world or that rise up in my spirit is still there struggling to break free.

It might not do anything for you the readers but it does great things for me. It frees my mind, my thoughts and emotions and opens them up to all sorts of possibilities. The words are freeing to me like wings of an eagle. They allow me to soar where I once just glided. It helps me to reason things out in my life and put things into greater perspective. So I pick up my keyboard and I move forward yet again but in a different direction. One that I feel destined to be on. I hope you'll join me on the flight and may something that is written speak to you, your spirit and your life. May His light and love be reflected in these thoughts and prose is my greatest desire.

Warmest blessings,

Be Glad Always

Oh how I used to despise the happy people of the world. You know the ones I'm talking about. They'd have a smile plastered on their face in a hurricane. There's one in every church, school, grocery store, and mall in America; and you can spot them a mile away. Don't let them open their mouths - OMG, I would just cringe to hear them say "what a great day" it was or "how lovely" everything in their life was going. In my mind I would be doing the finger gagging thing while trying to maintain my composure.



Depending on the day and my mood I'd fluctuate between wanting to smack the smile right off their face or vomiting at the unfairness of their apparent joy. I mean really, how can you be happy/glad all the time? Who is glad all the time? What planet are they from? We all have trials and tribulations. We all have life changing events that rock our world, so what makes them any different from us? Why are they always smiling when I want to crawl into a hole and let the world swallow me up? Why do they have joy when all I have is a bowl of lemons staring at me? Why are they laughing their way through life and not crying out at all the injustices around them in the world?



It's only taken me about 25 years to figure out that it had nothing to do with what was actually going on in their lives, but how they chose to let it affect them or not. That it's not the circumstances that affect the mood but the mindset that allows you to react negatively or positively to what is taking place in your life.



I have complete control (woo hoo!) over everything in my life if I learn how to work it. I am in control and for a Type A control freak like me that sounds pretty darn good - or does it?!? Actually, it scares me to death to think that I am in control. That God has allowed me to ponder out in my pea brain how I'm going to handle whatever comes my way. Even if it is as simple as saying - "God, I give it all to you" and to keep on moving forward without looking back, I have that right. I can laugh when I'm hurt, instead of crying; I can have peace in the midst of a storm if I look at it "in the now" and not get caught up in the "what if" game. I can be glad always in my circumstances if I but just believe, have a little faith and trust in His Word.



Again, a simple precept in this life journey that changes something very difficult into something so very simple. But we are a complex people and we thrive on chaos and complexity and snub our noses at simplicity; therefore, too many of us go through life miserable, down trodden and broken at our own choosing. Sigh. And I was one of them.



Now, it is a matter of choice - sometimes easy and sometimes not; but still my choice. Sometimes it happens out of habit or I find myself lamenting about a situation then I stop and say - nope, not going there. It's not worth it (getting in the pit, wallowing around for a few minutes, hours or days and then trying to climb back out filthier than a hog in a mud bath on a hot and humid summer day).



I'm choosing to be glad always, even if it means pasting on the smile in a hurricane and being hated by the masses for finding joy in spite of...





SCRIPTURE

"Be happy [in your faith] and rejoice and be glad-hearted continually (always)." I Thessalonians 5:16, AMP


TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria



How determined are you to enjoy each and every day? In today´s verse, notice how long we are supposed to be glad hearted. As long as people treat us right? As long as we feel okay? As long as the economy is up? No, it says, "Be glad hearted continually and always." That means we´re to be glad in the good times and in the tough times, when it´s sunny and when it´s raining. When those dark clouds are over your head and you feel like life is kind of depressing, kind of gloomy, always remember right above those dark clouds the sun is shining. You may not be able to see the sun in your life right now, but that doesn´t mean it’s not up there.

The good news is that those clouds are just temporary. The sun is going to shine in your life once again. In the meantime, keep your joy. Be glad hearted continually! Don´t let a few clouds sour your life. On the other side of every difficulty, the sun is shining! Make the decision to be glad always, and you´ll move forward in the victory He has in store for you!



A PRAYER FOR TODAY
Heavenly Father, today I choose joy. I choose to make the most of every day. No matter what is happening around me, I choose to focus on your goodness so that I can move forward in the
blessing you have for me. In Jesus´ Name. Amen.

Today's Devotional - Thank Me For Your Problems

Oh how my heart sang as I read these words! What reassurance, what freedom, what peace is garnered from this devotional. I long to be able to do just as He asks; no hesitation, no qualms or fears, just childlike obedience and the resulting reward that comes from it.

Alas, I am your typical Type A personality. I want to fix it myself. Do it “my way” even if I have no clue what “my way” is. I borrow from tomorrow, the next day and the next and I try to evaluate it from every “human” perspective only to be thwarted time and again by unknown forces. What a relief to know that if I give it up to Him then it will go away and I can be spared from the self-inflicted pain and agony of trying to fight a battle that is not mine.

In a perfect world, this is the perfect solution but I do not live or function in the perfect world so I must try to incorporate this into my life one painstaking step at a time; trying to change what has been inbred in me (perfectionism, independence, relentless pursuer, Type A personality that I am) and pray for a miracle of change in my mindset.

Thankfully, I bask in the knowledge that with God anything is possible but with man it is impossible. As an intelligent person wouldn’t I certainly choose God? With these odds, one would think so; but then why the hesitation, the lack of focus and commitment to make this a habit for success, for joy and for the peace that flows?


May 11

THANK ME FOR YOUR PROBLEMS. As soon as your mind gets snagged on a difficulty, bring it to Me with thanksgiving. Then ask Me to show you My way to handle the situation. The very act of thanking Me releases your mind from its negative focus. As you turn your attention to Me, the problem fades in significance and loses its power to trip you up. Together we can deal with the situation, either facing it head-on or putting it aside for later consideration.

Most of the situations that entangle your mind are not today’s concern’s; you have borrowed them from tomorrow. In this case, I lift the problem out of today and deposit it in the future, where it is veiled from your eyes. In its place I give you My Peace, which flows freely from My Presence. John 15:5; 2 Corinthians 1:8-9; Ephesians 5:20 – Jesus Calling