Hallow what?

In a couple of days, all across America, there will be ghosts, goblins, princesses, fairies and all sorts of other scary creatures knocking on doors while the parents stand around talking about how much fun this is - NOT. As you open your door you will be greeted with the words 'trick or treat' and a bag, pillowcase, plastic pumpkin or even a shy little hand will be thrust at you for whatever goodies you are passing out. Some will be funny, some will be crying because they are just as scared of all the other costumes and people as they are of the stranger answering the door. While others will be serious and give you grief if you think that you can get away with giving them only one piece of candy.

And of course let us not forget the older kids with their tricks of egging houses and cars, stealing the little kids’ bags and other dastardly deeds all while at home the adults will be donning their costumes to head to Halloween parties all over the place. I think the adults enjoy this holiday much more than the children because it gives them a chance to cut loose, in costume - anonymous, drink too much and make absolute jerks of themselves all in the name of fun.

Me personally, I hate the holiday and don't participate. My kids will wind up at a Fall Festival activity of some sort adorned in last minute costumes thrown together out of their dress up box and my makeup kit. They will get lots of candy that I will promptly take away and feed to my co-workers shamelessly for about a week. And the next morning life will go on as usual.

Isn’t life grand…

Family Reunion 2010

Thurman Oliver Person and Thurman Oliver Person, Sr.












My grandmother Mary Person.












From back to front we have Thurman Person, James Person, Annie Person, Mary Person, Bobby Person, Mary Louise Person, Shirley Person, David Fowlkes, Michael Person and Yvonne Fowlkes.

This weekend we had our family reunion in Crewe, Virginia. This is where Thurman Oliver and Mary Person put down their roots and raised their family. It is where I grew up when we moved from New York to Virginia. And this is where the majority of the siblings make their home today.

We had a great time. There was good food, lots of fun and fellowship. We saw daughters, sons, nieces, nephews, cousins one, twice, three times removed that we hadn't seen in a long time. We had a video camera set up for everyone to leave a message or tell a favorite story to be shared at the next reunion. We had the family tree and a short lesson about where we came from. We ate and then had a family meeting complete with a testimonial period where we got to give thanks and praise to God who is the head of our family. We had a time of remembrance for those that have gone on ahead of us but are never forgotten. This was bittersweet as we have had a few links in the chain broken over the last 9 months and the pain is still fresh.

The kids ran around playing, singing, dancing and acting like kids do. And all too soon it was over. Time to put away the food, pack up the decorations and clean up. Addresses were exchanged and hugs and love abounded. Everyone left on a high note and plates of Aunt Marion's homemade cake for a late night dessert. As we got in our cars to go our separate ways a few of us were already planning what we would do next year and thinking about those that couldn't make it this year and praying that they will be there next year.

Despite being tired, my spirit was full. I felt blessed to be a part of this great family that still carries on the legacy of my grandfather. We are a family that prays together and it is through that prayer that we have stayed the course over the years. We love, we fuss, we fight, we have our disagreements as most every family does but in the end when it's all said and done we are there for one another and that's what it's all about. So I am grateful to my grandfather who ruled with an iron fist and a love of God that rivals no other I've experienced in my life. We grew up reverent and fearful and because of that we have been blessed and it is my prayer that the legacy of love for God, family and friends will continue to carry on for the future generations of the Person family. A family that prays together stays together.


"And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him. Wives, submit to your own husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be bitter toward them. Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged. Bondservants, obey in all things your masters according to the flesh, not with eyeservice, as men-pleasers, but in sincerity of heart, fearing God. And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for[a] you serve the Lord Christ." Colossians 3:17-24 (NKJV)

Spring

Spring has sprung. If you can’t tell it by the buds on the trees or the flowers blooming, then you definitely know it by the yellow/green dust that is everywhere. Allergy sufferers like I have started out the season in earnest with red, itchy, watery eyes, noses running for days and headaches of monumental proportions due to the reproductive season of the plant world. There have been a lot of things going on these past few weeks with the kids, work, and home. Some good, some ok and other’s frustrating but I know that it’s all a part of life and where we are in the journey right now.

We had spring break last week, which was nice for all of us. Good Friday came and I was off enjoying my time and contemplating all the spiritual aspects of that day and the two following it. Easter we had a wonderful church service, and then a cookout and Easter egg hunt with family. The girls had a wonderful time. We all did. The weather was great and it’s always good when you can come together and fellowship without all the drama that can come with family and friends. I took two days off in the middle of the week to spend with the girls and we hit the road. Virginia Beach was crowded but nice. The water was ice cold but the sun and sand were hot. It was hard to believe everyone was out in their bathing suits trying to catch a tan that early in the year yet alone venturing forth into the water. They played in the sand; we soaked up the rays and then went to visit my grandmother. Klutz that I am took a spill, flipped over a fence, bumped my head on a bench, scrapped up my arm on the sidewalk and bruised my ankle. It would have been a money winner on America’s Funniest Videos for sure. To make matters worse the girls stood around looking at me splayed out for the world to see without thinking to assist me. Finally one of them ran to get Tony so he could help me untangle myself from the broken fence and up on my feet. Thursday we vegged around the house, in the yard and about the area taking care of errands and such. Friday I escaped back to work to recoup for the weekend. Overall it was a great week but I was glad for Monday when life could get back to normal.

We’ll struggle to keep them focused for the last two months of school as they dream of shorts sleeves, tank tops, swimsuits, the beach, Busch Gardens and days when they can sleep however late they want and do nothing but nag us about how bored they are. I will work diligently to find ways to occupy their minds and keep them relatively active and learning for the 100+ days of boredom known as summer vacation. Whatever happened to the days when you could farm them off to the grandparents?

99 Things I Ought To Have Done

This was too cute not to do. It was a great way to see that I've done a lot more with my life than I originally thought.

Instructions: Copy the list, bold the ones you've done (with explanations if needed), share with friends.

1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland (I drove up to the gates and took picture for my kids when I went to FL for business :-) Seriously, I have a great fear of going there. All those kids...
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a thunder and lightning storm (the first 21 years of my life I hid under my bed or in a closet, when I became a parent I "got over" my fear)
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon (I will run my first marathon on March 27, 2010)
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community
36. Taught yourself a new language (does pig-Latin count???)
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance (car accident 2007)
47. Had your portrait painted (if those caricatures count)
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone (my big toes will never be the same)
78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle (I used to consider this better than sex then I met my husband...)
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve
86. Visited the White House
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life (does it count if you were the one doing the killing but changed your mind???)
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Got a tattoo
94. Had a baby
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

Happy Thanksgiving

This has been a year full of many things to be thankful for. My increased faith and relationship with God and my husband coming into the family being the best of these for me personally. The least of these how things went today. I overslept, the oven caught fire, the vacuum cleaner broke, the turkey was a little dry and now the refrigerator has decided to go on the fritz. However, in spite of all the attempts by the enemy to take away from our joy this day it has given us a reason to give even more thanks!

First, we thank Him for life. We awoke this morning to sunshine, birds singing and warmer weather. We all have our health and strength and despite whatever differences we experience with each other during the day we love one another.

Secondly, we have the basic necessities in life that so many people take for granted; a home, food, clothes, transportation and jobs.

Thirdly, we are blessed beyond measure and we know that. We are surrounded by our friends and family and at the end of the day that is one of the most important things of all besides the knowledge of Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior and the love of God.

The extra sleep was welcomed and very much needed. The fire in the oven was a distraction that set me back by a 1/2 hour but no harm was done and I believe these were the best sweet potatoes I've ever made! The vacuum cleaner has served us well and with a house full of kids there are plenty of things it could pick up on any given day that could have caused it to fizzle out. This was my first "small" turkey -12 pounds and it didn't have the pop up letting me know when it was done so I had to go with my instincts... enough said (I don't do much in the "small" arena so I was a little out of my league) and well the refrigerator is 8+ years old and has held up well under 10 kids so I can't complain. The timing sucks but we have a back-up in the basement as we have to have 2 refrigerators and a freezer to keep up with the food needs of the family.

So at the end of the day it is all good. We are full, happy and counting our blessings even as we prepare to hunker down for the evening. The kids are asleep, the house is quiet and we have had a great day.

Thank you Lord.

"Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18 (NIV)

MIA no more

Yes, I have been Missing In Action but here I am again. This summer has been slam packed full of activities that have kept me off the boards and living life or something similar to it. We have had 5 trips to the beach, 4 trips to North Carolina, attended 3 family reunions, went to the park, the zoo, the farm and then some. I am tired from ripping and running up and down the highway although I have to admit that I didn't do the driving! Thanks honey...

We had physicals, dentist and orthodontist appointments, eye appointments, summer school and now we are gearing up for orientation and back to school nights at 2 different schools for 4 different kids.

Somewhere during that time I worked my normal 10-12 hour day schedule and managed to take off 2 whole days to make long weekends with the kids.

We had the stomach bug run through the house 2 times, poison ivy, mosquito bites, spider bites, found snakes, moles, and mice in the yard and cleared a spot for the garden. We had sinus infections, a summer cold, nose bleeds, scrapes, bumps and bruises and one broken arm (not one of our kids) but nothing we couldn't handle.

The pool offered respite on those hot, humid days, the trampoline gave them exercise and giggles galore, they swung, they slid on the slide, they rode bikes, they went to the park, they played in the dirt, they played at the mall and they watched less TV and spent more time outside. Our bi-weekly trips to the library kept them well read and their teachers will be pleased at their reading list for the summer. I just love the library!

It was a successful summer but I'm not sorry to see it end. I'm ready for the routine of school - the going to bed, getting up and doing everything according to a schedule. I'm looking forward to no more arguments about staying up late, what's for breakfast, I'm bored, it's too hot outside, can we go outside, can I ride my bike, I don't want to ride my bike, what are we going to do, where are we going, are we there yet.

Done, done and done at least for the next 105 days until Christmas holiday when they will be out for two weeks and bored by the third day home.

The ABC's of Me

A - Age: 44 and loving it!!!

B - Book you're reading: Roadside Crosses - Jeffery Deaver

C - Chore you hate: Cleaning bathrooms - I'm a germaphobe

D - Dad's name: Jeffery

E - Essential start your day item: Prayer

F - Favorite way to exercise: walking outside or at the Y

G - Gold or Silver: Both I like them together

H - Height: 5'9"

I - Instruments you play(ed): None

J - Job title: Executive Assistant

K - Kid(s): Jamar, Sydney, Kyra, Antonio, Justice, Mikayla & Victoria

L - Living arrangements: Own a house

M - Mom's name: Shirley.

N - Nicknames: Mom, Mommy, Honey, Baby and probably a few I don't know about

O - Odd habits: I can't skip buttons, snaps, etc. It's a compulsion.

P - Pet: None

Q - Quiet or Loud: Quiet. Unless I'm ranting

R - Right or left handed: Left.

S - Siblings: 3

T - Typical dinner: Mac n Cheese and hot dogs for the kids, spinach salad w/salmon for me

U- University: Virginia Tech - Go Hokies!!!

V - Vegetable you dislike: Artichoke, water chestnuts.

W - Weirdest talent: I'm still alive and kicking despite everything that has happened in my life

X - X-rays you've had: My lungs, chest, feet, wrist, hips, shoulder

Y - Your favorite place to visit: the beach

Z - Zoo favorites: tigers

My Better Half, My Soul Mate - Tony

I've had a few requests to spill the beans so I guess it's time to reveal the person behind the mega watt smile on my face, the extra (much needed) weight, the difference in my attitude and the new name.


I never wanted or anticipated another man entering my life. I'd spent the last two years of my life climbing out of a hell pit and was as broken as humpty dumpty. I was busy living my life and trying to put the pieces back together again.


I was taking care of the kids, working, and when I found the time trying to help others who were going through what I had gone through myself all the while believing that God had allowed me to go through this for a reason that would one day be revealed to me and it was. He allowed me to be broken so that he could mold me and build me back up. To be a strong woman/help mate to someone who he had hand picked for me but I had no idea existed.



Before the recession I traveled for work pretty frequently. I had been to this particular venue three times and I had never seen him before until the last visit. But I didn't really see him then, he saw me and as they say, "that was the end of that." We talked, talked and talked some more; and when I left I remember "feeling" (yes, I felt something!!!) let down, sad and curious at the same time. As I drove back to Richmond I couldn't remember what he looked like but I could remember every conversation we had.




Over the course of a few months we talked about everything and anything. I do mean EVERYTHING. I threw it all out there. The good, the bad and yes, the ugly parts of my life. I tried every tactic I knew to scare this guy off, the kids, the ex-husband, the abuse, the anger, frustration, bitterness and hatred that was bottled up in my heart and yet he was still here. I let him meet the kids and see what life was really like and yes, he was still there. After a while I couldn't imagine him not being there, listening, talking to me, calming me down and helping to glue the pieces back together one by one. He was with me in spirit when he wasn't there physically and we burned up the phones and our fingers texting messages day and night.



He's nothing like what I would have imagined for myself. I wouldn't have sought him out and I certainly don't understand the connection other than to say that it is deeper than any I've had besides the one with my dad. First off, he puts God first in his life, which is an absolute must for me. He's younger... thank goodness because he has to have a lot of energy to keep up with the kids and me. He's a thinker, a dreamer and a planner. He takes very good care of me - better care than I take of myself. He puts my needs above his which I can't fathom and forces me to stop, relax and listen to my body and what it needs.



He takes excellent care of the kids and has been a stabilizing factor in their lives. He's made our house a home and us a family once again that is healing together. He has taught the girls to read, write, add and subtract and given them the individual attention they have each needed to succeed in school this year. Both the babies are ready for kindergarten but only one gets to go in the fall. She is well ahead of the curve and could easily go into first grade.



We laugh, play, go places and have fun. We work together as a family to do the chores around the house. We have a plan and our life is filled with purpose again. Everything isn't perfect, we still have our issues but he takes it in stride, standing firmly by my side, giving me the support that I need to overcome whatever obstacle is before me.



He supports me and my crazy work schedule often wearing multiple hats; cook, maid, taxi driver, gardener, auto mechanic, contractor, etc. He's multi-talented, laid back and down to earth. I haven't laughed this much in years and I'm learning to relax and enjoy life like I never have before. He's not perfect but neither am I and he doesn't hold it against me. I get mad, have my moments and take him through the ringer as I continue this healing process and in return he loves me through it all.



He knows my thoughts, my feelings and emotions sometimes better than I do. When I need space, he gives me space and when I say I do but I don't he has a feel for that too. He's seen me cry, wiped my snotty nose and quieted my nightmares and fears in the middle of the night all without complaint. He teases, picks and is determined to make me lighten up in my old age. But most of all I know without a doubt that he loves ME - all of me, inside and out. Warts, wrinkles, gray hair, flat feet and aching bones. It doesn't matter.



We compliment each other. And just as it was ordained in the bible, where I am weak, he is strong and vice versa. We fit together like "peas and carrots". He's my ying and I'm his yang. Together we have become one. And I love this man - bald head, chicken legs, goofy grin and all. He completes me.



Bottom line...I'm happy!!! Incredibly blessed and looking to the future with great joy and anticipation of what God has in store for us.